Are Terry Bradshaw’s ears ringing?
The Seattle Times
Take that, Hollywood Henderson!
“If LeBron James couldn’t spell cat, I want him on my team,” ex-NBA great Charles Barkley told Philadelphia’s CBS Radio. “I always tell people, give me a dumb guy that can really play.
“Don’t give me no smart guy.”
Dateline Indianapolis: The NCAA, buoyed by its punishment of Johnny Football, suspends Miami for first two quarters of this week’s Florida game.
Vince Lombardi lives
“In celebration of the beginning of high school football season,” wrote Mike Bianchi of the Orlando Sentinel, “three of my favorite motivational quotes from high school coaches:
“ ‘There’s no traffic on the extra mile.’
“ ‘Teamwork makes the dream work.’
“ ‘The only time success comes before work is in the dictionary.’ ”
The San Francisco Giants finally coughed up $545,000 in back wages and damages to clubhouse workers for violating minimum-wage, overtime and record-keeping laws.
Apparently they’ve been a little short on petty cash after paying Barry Zito his $20 million.
Get real, Donal
New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman filed a $40 million lawsuit against Donald Trump University, calling it a fraud.
But call us back, he added, when your football team goes on NCAA probation.
Talking the talk
• Brian Manzullo of the Detroit Free Press, on EA Sports giving back-to-back Lions — Calvin Johnson in 2012 and Barry Sanders in 2013 — some video-game love: “That’s now two ‘Madden NFL’ covers and one playoff win in 56 years.”
• Greg Cote of the Miami Herald, on a horse named Johnny Football making its debut at Saratoga: “I hear he finished last after stopping mid-race to sign autographs.”
• Steve Simmons of the Toronto Sun, recalling that the Blue Jays’ scoreboard flashed the words “World Series or bust” on opening day: “So it turned out to be quite prophetic.”
• Unnamed Nebraska fan, to the Lincoln Journal-Star, after the heat index for the Cornhuskers’ opener hit 100 degrees: “If I’d known I was going to lose 20 pounds, I would have drunk more beer last night.”
More night games please
Researchers say humans, on average, spend 36 percent of their lives sleeping.
Unfortunately for long-suffering Cubs fans, it’s the wrong 36.
Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or firstname.lastname@example.org