Bethune-Cookman women’s basketball: Not the all-hands team
The Seattle Times
No diaper dandies on this team, apparently.
Vanessa Blair-Lewis — on leave from coaching the Bethune-Cookman women’s basketball team because she just gave birth to a son — is already rejecting her players’ offers.
“We turn the ball over too much for them to babysit my kid,” Blair-Lewis joked to AP. “Once we get better at holding onto the ball, I’ll consider it.”
• At TheOnion.com: “Freshman basketball star spends final semester visiting favorite campus haunts.”
• At ESPN.com, on Marshawn Lynch’s reluctant interviews: “Brief Mode.”
Talk to the animals
First a Florida manatee on a six-year winning streak is picking the Broncos to win the Super Bowl — and now Eli, an ape at Salt Lake City’s Hogle Zoo, is putting a similar six-year streak on the line by picking the Seahawks.
What’s next, a prescient Pennsylvania porcupine to break the tie?
Silent Film Dept.
The plot of the new film “That Awkward Moment” is:
a) Three friends vowing to remain single.
b) Super Bowl MVP Marshawn Lynch’s postgame interview.
Stat of the Day
From Nick Canepa of the San Diego Union-Tribune: San Diego State kickers missed more extra points (6) than all NFL kickers combined (5) in 2013.
Pass the popcorn
Richard Sherman’s favorite movies, from comedy writer Tim Hunter:
• “Old Yeller”
• “A Crabtree Doesn’t Go To Brooklyn”
• “Defensive Back to the Future”
• “Are You Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, Bro?”
Hold that line
A group of Northwestern football players signed union cards and filed them with the National Labor Relations Board.
Giddy pigskin pundits are already envisioning labor’s first unbalanced picket line.
Talking the talk
• Greg Cote of the Miami Herald, on increased security at the upcoming Sochi Olympics: “ For example, downhill skiers will now slalom through metal detectors.”
• Brad Dickson of the Omaha (Neb.) World-Herald, on Justin Bieber skipping the Grammy Awards: “I guess it conflicted with qualifying for Talladega.”
• CBS’s David Letterman, on Tuesday’s State of the Union address: “How many of you watched just for the commercials?”
Uneasy on the ice
The NHL’s Phoenix Coyotes will be redubbed the Arizona Coyotes next season, the team announced.
Given the team’s 2-8 faceplant in playoff series since its 1996 move from Winnipeg, maybe it ought to be Wile E. Coyotes.
Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or firstname.lastname@example.org
About Sideline Chatter | Dwight Perry
Times night-desk editor Dwight Perry uses Sideline Chatter as a not-so-safe haven for the humorous, offbeat and bizarre events and characters that color the sports landscape. His Page 2 column runs Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays in Sports.
email@example.com | 206-464-8250