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Originally published Thursday, November 7, 2013 at 6:32 PM

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Sometimes athletes’ aches and pains stem from stupidity


The Seattle Times

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Knee Injury of the Year? You make the call:

• Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte (torn MCL, sprained ACL), who fell when an overly exuberant teenage girl jumped on him.

• Kentucky receiver Alexander Montgomery (torn ACL), after chest-bumping a teammate to celebrate his TD catch.

Discount double shock

Police in Mayville, Wis., arrested a 42-year-old Bears fan who carried out an alcohol-fueled bet over Monday night’s game and tasered his wife three times when Chicago upset her beloved Packers.

Hubby got charged, too — with felony possession of an electronic weapon.

Hog wild

Give Kansas State credit for offering students free bacon to boost attendance for its women’s basketball opener, but dock the Wildcats for style points.

Alas, they’re playing Tennessee State, not the Razorbacks.

Faster than lightning

Flipper Anderson, who holds the NFL record for most receiving yards in a game (336), did it in 1989 playing for the:

a) Rams

b) Dolphins

Just call him Ace

Golfer Jason Kokrak, a 6-foot-4, 225-pound Canadian, scored a hole-in-one during the McGladrey Classic Pro-Am in Sea Island, Ga. — from 409 yards out.

“So you’re telling me there’s a chance?” said Jaguars fan Lloyd Christmas.

Dirty work

“Some health experts believe being an NFL coach might be the most stressful job in America,” noted TBS’s Conan O’Brien. “The second-most stressful job in America is being an NFL parole officer.”

Quote marks

• Ex-Rutgers basketball coach Mike Rice, to The New York Times magazine, on the fallout from his firing: “Now I have to sit back and take it, listen to people say I was abusing my players?

“I was an idiot, but I never abused anybody.”

• Comedy writer Tim Hunter, on a new poll claiming that the U.S. obesity rate is slowly climbing: “Oh, wait, it’s not climbing — it’s taking the elevator.”

• Steve Harvey of The Bottom Ten, on Colorado’s 1-7 record in pregame coin flips: “A team spokesman said the Buffs would spend extra time practicing coin-calls this week.”

• Reggie Hayes of the Fort Wayne (Ind.) News-Sentinel, on Jack Del Rio’s role as Broncos interim coach: “Del Rio will still call plays on defense and nod a lot to Peyton Manning on offense.”

Surf’s really up

The Guinness Book of World Records crew is on high alert after a surfer off the coast of Portugal reportedly caught a 100-foot wave.

Or as surfing sabermetricians prefer to call it, hanging 10-squared.

Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com



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About Sideline Chatter | Dwight Perry

Times night-desk editor Dwight Perry uses Sideline Chatter as a not-so-safe haven for the humorous, offbeat and bizarre events and characters that color the sports landscape. His Page 2 column runs Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays in Sports.
dperry@seattletimes.com | 206-464-8250

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