Not to say NBA season's running long, but fireworks are being lit
So what's another 41 days when you're having fun? "We're coming up on the 40th anniversary of the NBA Finals between the Knicks and Lakers...
The Seattle Times
So what's another 41 days when you're having fun?
"We're coming up on the 40th anniversary of the NBA Finals between the Knicks and Lakers, which ended May 10, 1973," wrote Bob Molinaro of the Norfolk Virginian-Pilot. "If this year's Finals go the distance, hoops could wrap up as late as June 20."
• At Fark.com: "Mike Tyson now a vegan, will only bite opponents who have cauliflower ears."
• At TheOnion.com: "D battery elected to Philadelphia Sports Hall of Fame."
Sultan of Shred
Yankees slugger Alex Rodriguez purchased a Florida clinic's documents to keep them away from Bud Selig's drug investigators, The New York Times reported.
Or, as A-Rod apologists prefer to spin it: the old hidden-bill trick.
"John Daly, the trailer park called after seeing your pants," tweeted Dan Jenkins from the Masters. "They want their shower curtains back."
From Vancouver, B.C., comic Torben Rolfsen: "In college basketball, '40 minutes of hell' refers to:
a) "Nolan Richardson's Arkansas teams.
b) "Dick Vitale calling a Duke game."
Here, kitty, kitty
Lakers forward Metta World Peace, when asked how he was able to play just 12 days after knee surgery, explained: "I'm too sexy for my cat."
Kobe Bryant immediately went out and bought a cat.
Kids' menu, please
What's this — 14-year-old Tianlang Guan made the cut at the Masters?
"Good Lord, can you imagine if he actually won the thing?" wrote Mike Bianchi of The Orlando (Fla.) Sentinel. "It would be the first documented case in history where the Champion's Dinner is relocated to a mall food court."
• White Sox catcher Tyler Flowers, via Twitter, from the Too Much Information file: "Adam Dunn just clogged the toilet in the clubhouse ... this happens at least twice a week."
• RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com, on reports that rapper P Diddy has replaced Tigers ace Justin Verlander as Kate Upton's beau: "That's what I call a change-up."
• Blogger TC Chong, on Tiger Woods' controversial "Winning Takes Care of Everything" Nike ad: "Elin is releasing her own version: "A 9-iron takes care of everything."
A surefire hit
Not that there's bad blood with the Padres over Zack Greinke's broken collarbone or anything, but when is Carlos Quentin Bull's-Eye Jersey Night at Dodger Stadium?
Bonus points if it's sponsored by Target.
Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or email@example.com