Deer 1, Dinner 0.

A Michigan motorist struck a deer with his car and threw it in the back with visions of venison, but it wasn't road kill, after all.

When the man opened his trunk in a Red Roof Inn parking lot to get a police officer's documentation, Bambi sprang to life, jumped out — and disappeared into some nearby woods.

Here's guessing the man didn't order any fast food to go on the drive home.

Headlines

• At SportsPickle.com: "Republicans demand spending cuts in exchange for joining President Obama's NCAA tournament pool."

• At TheOnion.com: "Basketball coach sees something in 7'3" high-school sophomore."

Numb and number

9,223,372,036,854,775,808-to-1? Putting the odds of filling out a perfect NCAA bracket in perspective, from USA Today's Chris Chase:

• "That's one billion, 9.2 billion times.

• "It's 500,000 times more than our $17-trillion national debt.

• "You'd have a better chance of hitting four holes-in-one in a single round of golf."

Well, duh

The women's basketball team at Cumberland (Tenn.) University features a 6-foot-1 freshman center named Calamity Jane Coley.

To no one's surprise, she led the Bulldogs with a 61.1 shooting percentage.

Bad reception

Among the things a driver doesn't want to hear over his team radio during a race, as presented by Graham Rahal on CBS's Letterman show:

• "Why aren't you answering my texts?"

• "You're listening to 90.3 FM, Rio's number one for samba."

• "Dude, you're going the wrong way!"

Quote marks

• Dana O'Neil of ESPN.com, after upstart Robert Morris stunned Kentucky in its NIT opener: "According to the Department of Education's latest equity in athletics numbers, the Colonials men's basketball operating expenses are $307,670. Kentucky spent $212,242 — per participant."

• Times reader Bill Littlejohn, on the senior hockey team in Laurel, Md., called the Gerihatricks: "In the championship game, the coach got doused with a cooler of Boost."

• Brad Dickson of the Omaha World-Herald, on play-in winner North Carolina A&T: "Which I was surprised to learn is not a phone company."

• Comedian Argus Hamilton, on sports' most celebrated lovebirds sharing a mutual interest in skiing: "Lindsey Vonn is a seven-time world champion, and three Thanksgivings ago, Tiger Woods set a new world's record in the men's downhill."

Attention, copy editors

So, top-ranked Gonzaga survived a first-round scare from 22-point underdog Southern?

Just spell it Mark Phew until further notice.

Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com