"Since Affirmed last won a Triple Crown 34 years ago," wrote Barry Horn of The Dallas Morning News, "there have been:

• "12 perfect games pitched in Major League Baseball.

• "9 99-yard touchdown passes in the NFL.

• "9 walkoff home runs in World Series games.

• "5 repeat Super Bowl champions.

• "4 rounds of 59 on the PGA Tour.

• "1 tennis Grand Slam (Steffi Graf, 1988)."

News flash

Chad Ochocinco's decision: He's taking his baggage to South Beach.

Headlines

• At Fark.com: "Troy Aikman pays his ex-wife $1.75 million as part of their divorce settlement / Unfortunately, Troy retains custody of Joe Buck."

• At SportsPickle.com: "Looting in downtown Newark reportedly unrelated to Devils defeat."

Bearing arms

"Metta World Peace spent Sunday afternoon hiking in the mountains near Vancouver," reported B.C. comic Torben Rolfsen. "The local bears carried air horns and pepper spray."

Shock talk

Which baseball score is more shocking? You make the call:

a) Stony Brook 7, LSU 2.

b) Cubs 2, Tigers 0 — to win the 1908 World Series.

Bare Lie Dept.

Two women were arrested for exposing their breasts at Woodlands Golf Club, the hometown Alton (Ill.) Telegraph reported.

Apparently they wanted to make it a skins game.

He's in attack mode

Tommy Lasorda had a heart attack? Ex-Dodger Kirk Gibson wasn't surprised.

"Probably went out and pounded a huge meal, and went down," the Diamondbacks manager told AP. "I've eaten several meals with him, so I know what it's like. I felt like I was having a heart attack after eating with him as well."

Quote marks

• Brad Dickson of the Omaha (Neb.) World-Herald, on the Kings winning the Stanley Cup: "On Tuesday afternoon there was a victory parade going 2 mph in Los Angeles — wait, my mistake, that was rush-hour traffic."

• Comedy writer Alan Ray, on billionaire Robert Pera buying the NBA's Memphis Grizzlies for $350 million: "It would've cost $450 million, but he decided not to get something at the souvenir shop."

Breaking news

Boxer Timothy Bradley suffered a broken left foot in Saturday's controversial victory over Manny Pacquiao.

Though two of the three ringside doctors scored it 115-113, nonfracture.

Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or dperry@seattletimes.com