Talk about bad Swiss timing
Coincidence? Last Saturday, just hours before top-seeded Cleveland got ousted from the NBA playoffs, the wheels came off a car on a Swiss...
The Seattle Times
Last Saturday, just hours before top-seeded Cleveland got ousted from the NBA playoffs, the wheels came off a car on a Swiss highway after a botched tire change, bringing traffic to a standstill.
Surmised Times reader Bill Littlejohn: "Must've been a Cavalier."
Dateline Detroit: Overzealous Red Wings fan arrested for throwing Octomom on the ice.
North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il shocked the world this month by:
a) designating his 26-year-old son, Kim Jong Un, as his successor.
b) making the announcement while wearing a Texas Tech basketball jersey.
• At Fark.com: "LeBron undergoes procedure to remove growth from his mouth. No word yet if his foot is OK."
• At SportsPickle.com: "Dale Earnhardt Jr. fires his car."
Plumber Joe Pesco, undeterred after learning that restroom fixtures weren't included in an auction of old Yankee Stadium items, put in a bid on two grandstand seats instead.
"At least I can put the seats somewhere," Pesco told the New York Daily News. "I don't have any place to put a urinal."
If the baseball gods broke the mold when they created Tommy Lasorda, then how do you explain the physique of the Phillie Phanatic?
Skating through school
Five-time world champ Michelle Kwan will skate to the stage Saturday to receive her bachelor's degree in international studies with a minor in political science from the University of Denver.
And there won't be a dry eye in the house when they flash Kwan's GPA scores: 4.0 for technical merit, 3.9 for artistic impression — and 2.5 from the French judge.
Going on the DL
Romanian star Simona Halep, letting nothing get in the way of her tennis career, announced she plans to undergo breast-reduction surgery.
Or as the procedure is better known in tennis circles, fixed doubles.
• Dan Daly of the Washington Times, awed by the grandmother who rolled 154 consecutive times at an Atlantic City craps table without producing a seven: "Just call her the DiMaggio of Dice."
• Bill Fields of GolfWorld magazine, on the deliberate play of Germany's Bernhard Langer: "He often surveys his putts as if he's getting paid by the hour."
• Commentor Doug G., to Rivals.com, on reports that Notre Dame Stadium's 12-year-old scoreboard is up for auction: "Doesn't USC already own Notre Dame's scoreboard?"
Top of the nudes
Police who pulled up in Redondo Beach, Calif., were treated to quite a sight, the Torrance Daily Breeze reported: Professional skateboarder Jereme Rogers, high on psychedelic mushrooms, wandering atop the roof of his home, yelling, proselytizing — and naked.
Now that's putting the "X" in X Games.
Sideline Chatter appears Sundays, Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Dwight Perry: 206-464-8250 or firstname.lastname@example.org
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