SPOILER ALERT: If you're the kind of person who thinks the entire nation should contort itself into an artificial time reality constructed by tape-delay specialists at NBC Sports, you should close your eyes, cover your ears and hum loudly. You're just going to get upset.

The rest of you, consider the following obvious but unstated point about the apparent contradiction between huge ratings and widespread viewer anger over NBC's oh-so-many-ways lame coverage of the London 2012 Olympics:

NBC owns a monopoly broadcast contract for a highly popular event. Arguing that strong ratings translate to endorsement of delayed, over-packaged coverage is like insisting that all those people who line up and take a number at the local DMV office do so because it's just so awesome.

More ring-tossing:

Seriously, People: If you're still whining about news organizations posting Olympic results in real time, put on your buckskin tunic and go out and work on your rabbit snares. What you call a "spoiler," the rest of the world calls "news." Deal with it.

Even More Seriously: It's hard enough to follow the Games without the introduction of all these new sports. Mr. Wrap's DirecTV grid offered this description of one NBC Olympic segment: "Basketball, Horse. Basketball, women."

Hate to Sound Cranky Here, But: Isn't it about time overexposed beach volleyballers Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh Jennings got real jobs?

Actual Question from One NBC Beach Volleyball Analyst to Another: "Which of these two teams do you think the deep sand will favor?"

Listen Up: It probably was just habit, but it really wasn't dignified that Maria Sharapova did all that loud grunting as she lugged the Russian flag through the opening ceremony.

Best Olympic tweet, Aquatic Division: From Bremerton gold medalist Nathan Adrian: "Spoiler alert; I win."

Meanwhile, on the Global Gaffe Tour: Presidential (barely) hopeful Mitt Romney, R-Obamacare, will announce his vice-presidential pick on a special smartphone app. Unfortunately, because it was built by the designers of NBC's "LIVE" Olympic app, it will be seen by only about 16 people.

Call it the Dungeness Buzz: A new study documents surprisingly high levels of caffeine in waters off the Pacific Northwest. It explains why we saw a guy ordering up a four-shot crab latte at Tully's the other day.

The Upside: New choice at Anthony's: Coho, regular or decaf.

Needless Things Dept.: Big step for San Francisco hedge funder Chris Hansen, who got King County approval for his proposed David Sterndome entertainment complex in Sodo. As soon as he gets the City Council on board, he'll announce his previously silent partners: NHL franchise owner Ken Behring, Director of Basketball Operations Wally Walker, and Chief Scout Jim McIlvaine.

Speaking of the Arena: Shockingly, the City Council, in a letter to Hansen, requested changes to the deal that actually were right on point. Is everyone feeling all right down there?

And Finally: Tens of thousands of Canadians attended the series between the Mariners and the Toronto Blue Jays at Safeco Field. Surprisingly, they weren't even baseball fans. Apparently they saw the big, boxy building and mistook it for a Costco.

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