Midnight-movie mojo in "Dynamite Warrior"

"Dynamite Warrior" is pretty average as Thai action movies go, but as a midnight movie at the Egyptian tonight and Saturday, it's just about perfect.

Here are a few of the treats in store: A straw-hatted Robin Hood named Jone Bang Fai (Dan Chupong, star of the outrageous stunt-fest "Born to Fight") kicks serious bandit-butt while protecting desperate farmers; a smarmy villain (Puttipong Sriwat) stealing cattle to create a market for imported tractors; a gigantic ex-convict (Somdej Keawlue) who's the Thai action answer to James Bond's steel-toothed nemesis "Jaws"; and the demonic Black Wizard (Thai action director/choreographer Panna Rittikrai), cursed with an allergy to sunlight that's made his head look like a blistered pizza.

Oh, and did we mention the bad guys can only be vanquished by the menstrual blood of a virgin? Eventually, Jone's doe-eyed love interest Sao (Kanyapak Suwannakoot) — the Black Wizard's lifelong captive — is demurely willing to donate.

If you're getting the impression that "Dynamite Warrior" is insanely plotted for deliberate hilarity, you're right. Unlike the wireless mayhem of "Ong-Bak," this flick employs digitally hidden wire work to show Chupong surfing on bamboo rockets, and demonically possessed minions (let's call 'em Monkey-Man and Tiger-Man) leap and soar with the aid of low-budget ingenuity.

As directed by former camera operator Chalerm Wongpim, it all makes giddy sense according to twisted midnight-movie logic, and the stunts make the guys on "Jackass" look sane. Kids, do NOT try this at home!

Jeff Shannon: j.sh@verizon.net